CHAPTER FORTY - Holy Hero Worship
MIKE AND EDDIE SPOT TWO BELLHOPS IN A CLOSET IN THEIR SUITE, HANDCUFFED, CHAINED WITH LEG IRONS, THEIR ARMS TIED TO THEIR BODIES WITH FISHING WIRE, THEIR LEGS TIED TOGETHER WITH IT, TOO. EDDIE CALLS FOR A LOCKSMITH TO COME IN AND UNDO THE CUFFS AND LEG IRONS AND WE PICK UP THE STORY FROM THERE.
Holy crap, the boys are moanin' and bleedin' and best we can do is get a locksmith up here. We try takin' 'em out of the closet, slowly, but upon touch, they scream in pain. "Maybe ya oughta sit in here while we wait. But lemme get these gags off your mouths in the meantime." I introduce me and Eddie and tell 'em they're among friends, and all, and ask 'em what happened. One of 'em catches his breath, and says, "a picture tells a thousand words. They took some pics and threw 'em in here." Me-n-Eddie look and see a few photos on the closet floor. Holy Jesse James, they were both shot in the back. "Oh, so that's why it hurt so bad when we lifted ya". "Yeah, you don't know the half of it" "That's why we're askin' stuff, son." "Oh, oh yeah. Anyway, we were just makin' the rounds in the hallways and all, when we felt something at our backs and told to come here, not saying a word to anyone." The other bellhop chimes in, "we get in here, they tell us to take our uniforms off and to turn around, and we hear the gun go off and we both went down. It hurt so bad we couldn't even move, we just fell over. I hope we ain't paralyzed." Eddie offers to do whatever to make 'em more comfortable, like give 'em some water or something, which they accept. We look at the photos and sure enough, there's some snaps of them gettin' shot and being forced to look in the camera as they screamed. Finally we hear, "someone call for a locksmith?" and we yell that we're in here. The guy comes in and sees what's goin' on. "Holy smoke, what happened here? You guys into some role-playin' or somethin'?" Eddie and the guys get a little pissed off at this, but I explain that we're detectives and we found 'em like this, they were taken hostage by some sickos that stole their uniforms. "Oh, sorry, didn't mean to presume. It's just that ya see a lot of stuff in my line of work." "Funny, so do we." So, he gets to undoin' the cuffs and me-n-Eddie step aside to assess this whole thing. "What's the deal with the pics?", Eddie wondered. "They want the two of us to know who's doin' it. They want to deal with me-n-you." "Gosh, they don't even know us." "They remember what we did to 'em at the beach and they wanna get even. They ain't gotta know we're dicks. That ain't important to 'em. Guess we gotta call 911 after all. They gotta get them backs of theirs checked." "Right" and Eddie goes and calls the paramedics. The locksmith does his thing and even cuts the fishin' wire. We thank 'im and pay 'im for his time. The boys sit still, instantly rubbin' their arms after their hands were free. Eddie says, "hey, ya know, we got some breakfast here, ya want a little somethin'?" One of the bellhops laughs, "naw - thanks but no thanks - we eat that stuff all the time, we're a little sick of it." "Yeah, I ain't got much of an appetite with my back bein' all busted." "Hey, uh, can ya help us up, maybe if we walk around a little." "Ya sure that's a good idea, there?" Eddie whispers to me, "Mike, dontcha do the same thing when you're knocked down - walk outta the room and not get carried? Maybe they're made of the same stuff." Ya know, he was right. So, Eddie grabs one and I grab the other. They both holler when they get on their feet at first, but keep chantin' to themselves, "I can do this - not so bad - I can do this". They take a few steps over to the bed and sit down on it. "We make our livin' on our feet - we got a thing about lyin' down on the job." I gotta give 'em credit - they are made of the same stuff as me-n-Eddie. The paramedics come in, treat their wounds as good as they can. Before they take off, they say, "by the way, you guys are our heroes - we read a lot about you online." "Yeah, you guys are cool, if you can take a shot in the back and get back on your feet, so can we." Jeez, I can't believe it - a fan club. How 'bout that. So, they're on their way and the two of us decide to canvas the area, askin' anyone 'round here if they saw anything. There was a gardener outside. We think he oughtta have seen somethin', bein' outside and all. We go up to 'im "did you see a couple of guys out here with duffel bags by any chance?" "dressed like bellhops?" and he kept goin' on about how he didn't see nothin', he just works here, and all that. Pretty frustratin'. "Now, please I very busy, I must work" He was actin' like we thought he did somethin'. Eddie looks at me and whispers, "I got an idea. I hate to do this, but maybe..." and he flashes his badge real fast and says he's from immigration, and that his cooperation might cut 'im a break. "All right, all right, I tell you. I did see two bellhops lugging some bags into one of the courtesy trucks we have here. I didn't think anything about it then." We start to beat it, "okay, thanks." "Wait, do I get to stay here? I have a family." Eddie snaps his fingers and points to 'im, "Sure thing" and we make our next plan of action, go back inside to management and report that their bellhops were shot and taken hostage and that one of their courtesy vans was ripped off and get what the license plate numbers are - seein' if we can track these bastards. "We gotta call the cops and put the word out, check all the courtesy vans, they can have this all wrapped up in no time." "No way. This is our baby. We're the guys that really gotta put these bastards down. After what the cops did to Oscar - can't get over that. I gotta make this right. Seein' as this didn't happen too long ago, they can't have gotten too far, but then Miami Beach is a pretty big city, a lot of miles can be covered like that." "We can cover a lotta miles, too, Boss-Man." I laughed when he called me that. "Uh, Eddie, we're married now, why do ya still call me that?" "I'll never, ever forget that you took a real chance on me. You're a great detective and you're someone I can really learn from. We're married but I still worship you, you're still my hero and you always will be. Inside I'll always be that boy who dreamed of bein' your sidekick. It got me through life and it's what made me fall in love with you." He gave me a peck on the lips and grinned, "now let's go bust some bellhop balls".
We were off. Seein' as the hotel doesn't have very many courtesy vans, it oughta bring us real close to rescuin' the Hernandez boys. Just 'cuz this is gonna be a simple case, don't mean it's easy. The horrors that follow - I wouldn't wish that on my sworn enemy.
Holy crap, the boys are moanin' and bleedin' and best we can do is get a locksmith up here. We try takin' 'em out of the closet, slowly, but upon touch, they scream in pain. "Maybe ya oughta sit in here while we wait. But lemme get these gags off your mouths in the meantime." I introduce me and Eddie and tell 'em they're among friends, and all, and ask 'em what happened. One of 'em catches his breath, and says, "a picture tells a thousand words. They took some pics and threw 'em in here." Me-n-Eddie look and see a few photos on the closet floor. Holy Jesse James, they were both shot in the back. "Oh, so that's why it hurt so bad when we lifted ya". "Yeah, you don't know the half of it" "That's why we're askin' stuff, son." "Oh, oh yeah. Anyway, we were just makin' the rounds in the hallways and all, when we felt something at our backs and told to come here, not saying a word to anyone." The other bellhop chimes in, "we get in here, they tell us to take our uniforms off and to turn around, and we hear the gun go off and we both went down. It hurt so bad we couldn't even move, we just fell over. I hope we ain't paralyzed." Eddie offers to do whatever to make 'em more comfortable, like give 'em some water or something, which they accept. We look at the photos and sure enough, there's some snaps of them gettin' shot and being forced to look in the camera as they screamed. Finally we hear, "someone call for a locksmith?" and we yell that we're in here. The guy comes in and sees what's goin' on. "Holy smoke, what happened here? You guys into some role-playin' or somethin'?" Eddie and the guys get a little pissed off at this, but I explain that we're detectives and we found 'em like this, they were taken hostage by some sickos that stole their uniforms. "Oh, sorry, didn't mean to presume. It's just that ya see a lot of stuff in my line of work." "Funny, so do we." So, he gets to undoin' the cuffs and me-n-Eddie step aside to assess this whole thing. "What's the deal with the pics?", Eddie wondered. "They want the two of us to know who's doin' it. They want to deal with me-n-you." "Gosh, they don't even know us." "They remember what we did to 'em at the beach and they wanna get even. They ain't gotta know we're dicks. That ain't important to 'em. Guess we gotta call 911 after all. They gotta get them backs of theirs checked." "Right" and Eddie goes and calls the paramedics. The locksmith does his thing and even cuts the fishin' wire. We thank 'im and pay 'im for his time. The boys sit still, instantly rubbin' their arms after their hands were free. Eddie says, "hey, ya know, we got some breakfast here, ya want a little somethin'?" One of the bellhops laughs, "naw - thanks but no thanks - we eat that stuff all the time, we're a little sick of it." "Yeah, I ain't got much of an appetite with my back bein' all busted." "Hey, uh, can ya help us up, maybe if we walk around a little." "Ya sure that's a good idea, there?" Eddie whispers to me, "Mike, dontcha do the same thing when you're knocked down - walk outta the room and not get carried? Maybe they're made of the same stuff." Ya know, he was right. So, Eddie grabs one and I grab the other. They both holler when they get on their feet at first, but keep chantin' to themselves, "I can do this - not so bad - I can do this". They take a few steps over to the bed and sit down on it. "We make our livin' on our feet - we got a thing about lyin' down on the job." I gotta give 'em credit - they are made of the same stuff as me-n-Eddie. The paramedics come in, treat their wounds as good as they can. Before they take off, they say, "by the way, you guys are our heroes - we read a lot about you online." "Yeah, you guys are cool, if you can take a shot in the back and get back on your feet, so can we." Jeez, I can't believe it - a fan club. How 'bout that. So, they're on their way and the two of us decide to canvas the area, askin' anyone 'round here if they saw anything. There was a gardener outside. We think he oughtta have seen somethin', bein' outside and all. We go up to 'im "did you see a couple of guys out here with duffel bags by any chance?" "dressed like bellhops?" and he kept goin' on about how he didn't see nothin', he just works here, and all that. Pretty frustratin'. "Now, please I very busy, I must work" He was actin' like we thought he did somethin'. Eddie looks at me and whispers, "I got an idea. I hate to do this, but maybe..." and he flashes his badge real fast and says he's from immigration, and that his cooperation might cut 'im a break. "All right, all right, I tell you. I did see two bellhops lugging some bags into one of the courtesy trucks we have here. I didn't think anything about it then." We start to beat it, "okay, thanks." "Wait, do I get to stay here? I have a family." Eddie snaps his fingers and points to 'im, "Sure thing" and we make our next plan of action, go back inside to management and report that their bellhops were shot and taken hostage and that one of their courtesy vans was ripped off and get what the license plate numbers are - seein' if we can track these bastards. "We gotta call the cops and put the word out, check all the courtesy vans, they can have this all wrapped up in no time." "No way. This is our baby. We're the guys that really gotta put these bastards down. After what the cops did to Oscar - can't get over that. I gotta make this right. Seein' as this didn't happen too long ago, they can't have gotten too far, but then Miami Beach is a pretty big city, a lot of miles can be covered like that." "We can cover a lotta miles, too, Boss-Man." I laughed when he called me that. "Uh, Eddie, we're married now, why do ya still call me that?" "I'll never, ever forget that you took a real chance on me. You're a great detective and you're someone I can really learn from. We're married but I still worship you, you're still my hero and you always will be. Inside I'll always be that boy who dreamed of bein' your sidekick. It got me through life and it's what made me fall in love with you." He gave me a peck on the lips and grinned, "now let's go bust some bellhop balls".
We were off. Seein' as the hotel doesn't have very many courtesy vans, it oughta bring us real close to rescuin' the Hernandez boys. Just 'cuz this is gonna be a simple case, don't mean it's easy. The horrors that follow - I wouldn't wish that on my sworn enemy.
posted by Brendan Chenowith at 5:34 PM
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